Purpose vs pleasure. Is it possible to have both at the same time?
It’s a challenging question as purpose is often pursued at the expense of pleasure (running a marathon for a worthy cause for example) and then purpose is left on the shelf when pleasure is one’s only pursuit.
Pursuing comfort can certainly be a dream killer and pursuing pleasure at all costs is the biggest distraction there is.
Strange how the ‘world view’ that the media throws our way promotes this pursuit of pleasure at all costs. Many of us have had to learn the hard way that it will cost us more than we are willing to pay.
The problem with recklessly pursuing pleasure is that it places you at the centre. You become your own God and you’ll choose to benefit yourself every time you are faced with a choice.
There are indeed times when you need to put yourself first. Like times when you need to rest, recharge and reconnect. You can’t give your best if you are depleted of energy… However, we all need to give our best rather than always taking the best for ourselves. We exist to give and to create, to be producers rather than consumers.
Taking care of our environment has come as a result of realising we cannot keep taking without seeing a consequence. Whether with air quality or the landscape around us, taking more and more without thinking about the impact isn’t a great idea.
You see, purpose has giving as its central pursuit – that’s how you lead with impact. Businesses can lead with impact too, they don’t necessarily have to be just about making money. When a business exists purely to make as much money as possible, ultimately the owners or stakeholders are probably after more money to spend on the pursuit of pleasure. Might be on the house, sports car or luxury items. The problem is, these things are ok in themselves, but they get old, look outdated and wear out and you’re left needing more.
Purpose, on the other hand, has no problem with nice things BUT it views them in a different light, the light of progress. i.e. Will pursuing these things take me closer towards fulfilling my purpose or further away?
Last weekend we went shopping in one of the UK’s biggest shopping centres. As a family, we hadn’t intentionally taken time out to shop for a long time! It was a rare thing and all of us had the same budget. That was important, not just for the wallet but a lesson for each person to maximise their spending.
Pretty much all that was purchased was needed. Our children had all made choices to invest in things that were of use to them. Of course, there was the odd impulse purchase (a fried egg pillow), but generally, everyone bought things intentionally.
The key thing with the shopping trip was that it brought us together to hang out in a different environment than our home! The purpose wasn’t so much spending money as spending time! We had to deliberately declare a family day and then actually do it, on purpose!
The sad fact is that our children are getting older and while we live, learn and work together, we have not been spending much time having fun together! I’d been in London on my own the last two weekends, and I knew that Team Irwin needed time with me.
Well, we could have loaded a card up and sent them on their separate ways but that would have been missing the point. Admittedly, there were moments when Primark got too much for us boys, and my son and I left the girls to shop as we sneaked off for ice cream. That said, we all went to the same places, more or less, and had a better time as a result.
The road trip was part of the day, it didn’t start when we arrived at the venue and didn’t end when we left. The point was that 2024 had its first BIG family moment and our goal for 2024 is to make a few more of these kinds of moments!
Pursuing your purpose will cost you. It will be an investment of time and resources. There’s a price to pay! Where kids are concerned, it will cost you something to connect with them.
Purpose gives. Pleasure takes. I guess that is what I am trying to say. I am faced with two different ways in which I can approach life as a leader.
There is a certain pleasure to be found in pursuing purpose, but pleasure as its own goal isn’t a good thing for me. We didn’t go shopping to feel better, it wasn’t therapy, it was a family trip to bring us closer.
As parents, part of our purpose is to raise children that operate differently. We have to teach them that shopping isn’t a way to solve problems or even soothe them, but it can be a shared adventure. My role is to plan the next one.
Finding purpose in what you do will give you pleasure which enhances what it means to live and give. Then, in your business, you add value and impact others positively. When you pursue purpose, there’s no such thing as guilty pleasure! Guilt only comes with a selfish pursuit of pleasure because we are meant for better.
Business can’t be all about money it should also be about the impact we make and, when we get that right, the rest will follow.
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